Do you think that you don’t deserve?
Each of us has felt this burden at least once in our lives. That feeling of “I don’t deserve it”, whether it’s love, happiness, prosperity, or anything else. As if all the good things were reserved for others, but not for me. This sense of undeserving, this voice in your head, is one of the subconscious programs that can reside within you.
What does the sense of undeserving cause?
First and foremost — sadness. This program is like a dark shadow that creeps into our daily lives. It can lead to withdrawal, entanglement, detachment from reality, and even mental health issues. Sometimes, the sense of undeserving becomes so overwhelming that it leads to depression.
Undeserving tightens around us like chains, preventing us from fully experiencing life. If it lasts for too long, we turn into sadness itself.
How does undeserving develop?
As usual, it all starts in childhood. That’s when we are taught that we must fulfill certain roles — be polite, obedient, and useful. We used to hear things at home like, “You’re a child, so don’t speak up” or “You have to give your all, otherwise, you don’t deserve it.”
And even when you gave your all, it still wasn’t enough. No matter what or how much you did, it was always not good enough or too little. So it often ended with a reprimand. At home, there might have been a lack of praise and satisfaction with you, while criticism and nitpicking dominated.
From such an environment arises the belief that you have to earn everything — even love. There was no room for the sense that you could be loved simply for who you are.
All of this — submission, obedience, and even religion — builds a deep program of undeserving within us. It instills the belief that you don’t deserve good things, kindness, or prosperity. You start to believe that your worth depends on how much you achieve and how useful you are. The desire to be useful is what has further contributed to feeling undeserving — “I must be useful, I must matter, because I don’t deserve to just exist.”
And what if all of this is an illusion?
Pause for a moment and look at this mechanism. Look at the step you’ve built for yourself. Do you see that it was you who planned this step?
But why? Was it really necessary?
The path to freedom
Meanwhile, the true purpose — the purpose of this program of undeserving — is freedom. To be free and to live freely. When you start dissolving your sense of undeserving, you feel something incredible: freedom.
Suddenly, you discover that you can choose anything for yourself, you discover that you are deserving of love and happiness. Not because of what you’ve done, not because you have earned something, but simply because you exist.
Is this selfish?
No. We have come here to live and experience freedom, greatness, and our own uniqueness. And when we find ourselves, we begin to see the greatest treasure — being with another person, seeing their smile, feeling closeness, sharing happiness. We only discover the miracle of another human being when we are entirely free within ourselves.
So thank your sense of undeserving!
This program, although it’s so heavy, it can become a springboard to self-acceptance. To discovering your individuality and uniqueness. So you can thank your feeling of undeserving. It is because of it that you were able to become the person you are today.
Affirmation for when you think you don’t deserve
Now it’s time to practice. It’s time to soften this step within yourself, to soften the feeling of undeserving.
So close your eyes and feel:
“I take a breath of freedom, and all of me is already freedom. I allow myself to be me, and I am all joy. The joy of my existence makes me bloom. I bloom with love like the most beautiful flower.”
Feel it within you. Feel how you bloom, how you rise with love for yourself. Everything else, all that you’ve touched that wasn’t love, you soften and release. Now, you leave only one thing within yourself: infinite love. And this step now becomes checked off.
